Puke in my mouth

How’s that “dual” working out for you?

A few months ago I went to a meeting at Thing 1’s future school. It was a meeting about their new “dual launguage” class they are offering. They had a lot of hoops you had to jump through if you wanted to enroll your child in this class. Meetings, testing, deadlines… all very set in stone.

Well, we decied not to do the class. It was “dual” yet 90% of my son’s kinder teaching would be in spanish. 90%!!! So if he hated it and anted out, he would be behind all his regular kinder classmates. No thanks!

A month later we went to kinder round up. I noticed they pushed the dual class again to parents. Odd, since the deadlines for the testing and whatnot had passed by now. Then last week I notice the have it on the school billboard that there are dual openings. And today I get a phone call telling me about the dual program and how they have openings!

The deadlines for this program were 2 months ago. I guess no one else wants to put their kids in a class that is setting them up to be behind their peers either.

Good luck with that school board.

Wow, Beyonce. Just Wow!

This is Beyonce’s live mic to her lip syncing on the Today Show. OMG!

My ears are now bleeding.

I met the funniest doctor

TMI ahead. Be forwarned!

I went to see a GYN for my annual and about getting an IUD put in last week. I really liked the new doctor I saw. She was very personable, which is good since she’s about to be knee deep in my crotch.

So we decided to put in the IUD that day. She went to insert it and had to clamp open my cervix. She told me to cough really hard when she went to clamp the thingy on. I did and it hurt a bit. Then the medical assistant in the room askes “why do you make them cough?”

To which my Dr replies “To disctract them from the pain”. LMAO! That shit did hurt though.

What is this hot mess?

Ok, so this is “Tinted Windows”. A band composed of James Iha from Smashing Pumpkins, Taylor Hanson from Hanson, some guy from Fountains of Wayne and some other guy from Cheap Trick.

I swear I had to check my computer to make sure it wasn’t April 1st. What else could be to blame for this crap?

Seriously. You were in Smashing Pumpkins! What’s next? Thom Yorke in a band with Debbie Gibson and some guy from 2 Live Crew?

Dear God! My eyes! My eyes!!!

That is a huge moose knuckle!

I am a little evil

I went down stairs to get a snack. Thing 1 is watching a movie. I went in the pantry and Thing 1 noticed that.

So I threw him in a cereal bar.

A distraction so I could sneak away with the Famous Amos Chocolate Chip cookies >:)

Sucker!

Sleep deprivation

Last night the hubby and I were up late watching Lost and talking. When we went to be, he was trying to decided if he should sleep in a little later because he was really tired.

Well, he woke up early. And on his way out the door he backed into the garage door. He didn’t just bump it, he slammed into the damn thing. How can you do that? How can you back out without looking behind you. I don’t get it.

But, I managed to make the door look normal again so I think we are ok.

Ummmm….ok

Last month I had a company come out to give me an estimate of having our fence stained. After that they called me once or twice a week till we decided to go with them. So 2 weeks ago I call them. They call me back the next day and tell me they will be there Tues the 31st.

Tuesday come around. I stay home all day waiting for them. No one shows up. Fine asshats, I’ll do with someone else. I really don’t even want to call and bitch them out because I know if they say “we’re sorry, how about we knock $XX off the price” I will say “Ok”. So I plan to just ignore it.

Today I get up and head off for a day of shopping. I come home about 3pm to see them out staining my fence! What?!

I hadn’t paid these people a dime. What if they had the wrong house!

I say to the painter guy “I wasn’t expecting you, they told me you were coming yesterday”. He says the company told him to just head over this afternoon. Huh!?

So now my fence is stained and it looks great, but I’m still am amazed they just started staining my fence with no one home and no deposit made. Dumb asses.

I’m crying from laughing

Bwhahahaha!